Thursday, June 28, 2018
Friday, November 2, 2012
The Gate (1987)
I feel like I should have seen this movie as a kid, but it somehow stayed under my radar until it popped up on Netflix. I loved it. This painfully 80s selection stars 14 year old Stephen Dorff who accidentally opens a gate to hell in his backyard, unleashing a bunch of demons. It's totally a "kid's" horror movie, but it's actually pretty damn Satanic, complete with a rare heavy metal album that contains the secrets to the demon world. Aces.
Beyond Re-Animator (2003)
I was glad to finally finish the Re-Animator trilogy, but man is this movie awful. I mean, I loved it, but let's not pretend that it's anything but a set-up for gratuitous splatter, sexy girls, and dismembered phalli.
The Innkeepers (2011)
I mentioned this in my review of The House of the Devil. I actually caught this film in theatres when it came out last year, and was glad to see it again. I actually didn't quite pick up the first time that this movie is supposed to be set in the late 90s/early 00s, and there's a sort of cheesy feeling to it that plays off of that era. A tad predictable, but the humor and creepiness make it solid enough in my book.
Audrey Rose (1977)
This wasn't really a horror movie in the traditional sense, though there were some startling scenes, but I found it intriguing and enjoyable. The concept is pretty cool, it's about a girl who dies at the exact second another girl is born, and her spirit enters the body of the other girl.
The Wicker Man (1973)
This is my movie, dudes. I first watched this when I was a teenager and haven't seen it since. I quickly realised while I was watching it that the version I had first seen had been heavily edited, as it had way more tits and random musical numbers than I remembered. Anyway, it's a genuinely good and scary film and I highly recommend it.
I had heard a lot of buzz about this movie being really good/scary, but it literally put me to sleep. Like, I can't actually review it because I missed the last 15 minutes and I don't feel super motivated to fire it back up to watch the end. The acting was piss-poor, I didn't think it was scary at all; all the "ghosts" or whatever just looked like people in goth make-up. I was like, hey, you're not scary, I saw you at the club last week.
Dead Snow (2009)
I had been wanting to see this for awhile, and I'm thrilled I finally got the chance. It really is hilarious, and gory, and gross, and everything you'd expect in a Nazi zombie film.
Scream 2 (1997)
I was actually quite fond of the Scream films when they first came out. I'm pretty sure this was my first time watching this since it then, but it's still a fairly good watch. Nothing too mind-blowing, but a solid Halloween selection, and a lot of great 90s nostalgia.
I have mixed feelings about found footage films, but this wasn't too bad. At least...it was short, and it came together at the end. I don't really get scared by films like this, but if you don't mind shaky cam, it could be worth a look.
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987)
This is my favorite of the NoES films, and it stands up to watch after watch. I am totally planning on being Taryn (dream version, pictured at left) for next Halloween (or just, you know, the next time I go to the club.)
Other honorable mentions include Garfield's Halloween Adventure, It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, and the Invader Zim Halloween episode. That's it for this year's films! I hope everyone had a great Halloween!
Thursday, November 1, 2012
I'll be honest: I was expecting this to be awful and figured that at best I'd have something I could make fun of. It's actually awesome and funny as hell. Any movie where a dog carries around a severed demon hand in its mouth is generally going to go over well with me.
The Shrine (2010)
I doubt this film will go down in any history books as an example of high quality cinema, but it will always hold a special place in my heart for being one of the few horror films to make me scream out loud (The Orphanage is another on that list, you may recall from last year). It's actually not a bad film at all, with some genuine creepiness, a cool twist at the end, and some seriously fucked up death scenes.
I don't really need to write a review of one of the best films ever made, but I will throw out the recommendation that this is not the best film to watch while completely shitfaced. I ended up getting really confused.
The House of the Devil (2009)
I. Love. This. Movie. Seriously. I've been a fan of Ti West since I saw Innkeepers in theatres last year, and I put this film on the second I realised it was on Netflix. I first watched it in September, but of course I had to watch it again as part of my Halloween preparations. The thing I really like about this movie and Ti West's other work is that it's great at building tension and suspense. It might seem slow to some people, but it has a great atmosphere and some incredible pay-off scenes.
Technically not a film, but I really wanted to include it here. My roommates and I spent much of this week watching this entire series on Netflix, and what's more Halloween-ish than a show about kid whose parents sold his soul to the devil and is forced to become a soul reaper working directly under Lucifer himself? Reaper isn't particularly scary, but it's full of fun demons, engaging characters, and a lot of great one-liners. Definitely worth checking out (even if it was cancelled prematurely.)
Apartment 143 (2012)
Our decision to watch this was mostly spurred by the fact that it featured Rick Gonzalez, who plans Ben in Reaper, and that was actually the sole redeeming factor of this skippable, not scary yawn-fest.
Seed of Chucky (2004)
I've actually never seen any of the Child's Play films, and I never would have bothered to watch this, but my roommate randomly put it on and I didn't feel like getting up off the sofa. That said, I thought this was pretty funny and it had some good death scenes and also, randomly, John Waters.
I apologise again for the delay in week 3. I will be posting the finale and some other Halloween entries in the next few days, so sit tight and don't lose your Halloween spirit just yet!
Monday, October 15, 2012
Perfect Blue (1997)
A true anime horror/thriller classic. I've always been very fond of this film, and everything from Satoshi Kon. This was the first movie of his that I watched, and it's still amazing every time I see it.
Trick or Treat (1986)
This movie is way too much fun. A violent rock star gets resurrected when his album is played backwards and wreaks havoc, culminating in an explosive Halloween night concert. I'm just about dying to see someone pull off a Sammi Curr costume. Cameos from Gene Simmons and Ozzy Osbourne just sweeten the utter delight that is this movie.
I wasn't intending to include Hellraiser in this month's films because I already did so last year, but seeing as how it's one of my all-time favorite movies, it made its way onto the list. I don't have much else to say about it...just watch it if you haven't already. And if you have already seen it, watch it again.
Hellbound: Hellraiser 2 (1988)
This was my first time watching any of the other Hellraiser films. I've heard a lot of mixed things, but figured the second one was at least worth a shot. I actually really enjoyed it. There are a lot of great gory scenes and the plot at least somewhat holds together. I tried to watch Hellraiser 3 later on and deemed it literally unwatchable after about 15 minutes. I rarely turn movies off, but yeah, definitely skip that one.
Ugggh, god this was bad. It's full of unsexy sex scenes and side ponytails. (I'm pretty sure they spent 80% of their budget on hair scrunchies.) It's so shittily acted and shot that even the 3-4 gory death scenes couldn't redeem it for me. I actually spent most of this viewing Skyping on my phone so, uh, yeah. Don't watch it.
I'm very fond of the original Halloween, so I was highly skeptical about watching this, but my roommate kept insisting that it was excellent. After watching it, I do not disagree at all. It's beautifully shot, well-acted, and true to the original, while at the same time adding a ton of new stuff. I loved it.
Repo! The Genetic Opera (2008)
It's pretty much my mission in life to get people to watch this movie. I've seen it quite a few times (and I listen to the soundtrack pretty often) and it never gets old. If you haven't seen it yet, I strongly recommend it. And if you don't like it, you are dead to me.
Hope you enjoyed week 2! Tune in next time when I will probably make up some movies that I didn't actually watch because I'll be on a road trip for half of next week.
Monday, October 8, 2012
I decided to start with a classic. Re-Animator has a firmly-fixed spot on my "movies I could watch forever and never tire of" list, and this viewing certainly did not disappoint. I am not ashamed to admit how sexy I find Jeffrey Combs.
Prince of Darkness (1987)
I'm just going to copy pasta the Facebook status I made about this film for this review: Prince of Darkness has everything I have ever wanted in a film: Victor Wong, Alice Cooper, people exploding into bugs and puking into each other's mouths, a decapitated corpse picking up her own head, and a guy getting stabbed by a bicycle.
Bride of Re-Animator (1990)
As much as I love Re-Animator, I had never bothered to watch the sequels (I have Beyond Re-Animator on my list for later), so I was eager to fire this one up! I, of course, completely fell in love with it. I think my favorite part was the creature made of fingers and an eyeball, and the dog getting a human hand grafted onto it. Greatly looking forward to finishing up the trilogy later this month.
Monster Dog (1984)
Put Alice Cooper in anything and I will watch it. Monster Dog is a terrible, terrible movie starring Alice Cooper as Vincent Raven, the world's most popular rock star. Don't get me wrong here: it's a shitty movie. The plot makes absolutely no sense, jumps around everywhere, the acting is atrocious, and the dubbing never syncs up. That said, I greatly enjoyed it. The best part by far is the opening music video, followed by the second musical number somewhere in the middle. Highly recommended for Alice Cooper fans and/or a bad movie night selection.
It's no secret that I adore Vincent Prince. I feel like the Halloween season cannot truly start until I hear his voice, ideally talking about murdering some blonde tartlet. I actually thought this film was really well-done, and it had a cool plot twist at the end. It's a very meta film; Vincent Price is practically playing himself, and they even show clips from several of his films. Very fun.
I cannot believe how incredible this movie is. It's a sickeningly colorful, hilarious, over-the-top cheesy, awful-but-fantastic-at-the-same-time alien invasion film where the day is saved with the power of heavy metal (seriously.) Please trust me when I say you really will not regret watching this movie.
Slither has been on my list for quite awhile, and I'm thrilled my roommates agreed we should all watch it Sunday night! I never actually saw the appeal of Nathan Fillion before, but now I have a full-on crush on him. Slither is gross, freaky, scary, and funny. Highly recommended.
Monday, March 12, 2012
I spent a few of my childhood summers at a Girl Scout camp called Camp El-O-Win. They had a variety of activities, including a brief foray into horseback riding. This should have been one of the more interesting parts of the camping experience, considering it was up against 'bracelet making' and 'not getting poison oak'. The only other thing to really look forward to was the one shower you got towards the end of the week.
blissfully unaware of the dangers looming ahead
It was my first time riding a horse (unless you count carnival pony rides or this adorable photograph), so the counselors picked one out for me that would be good for beginners. I ended up with 'Molly', a big brown clunky thing that I assumed would be docile. Gentle. Nice. You know, "good for beginners".
So, that was wrong. This horse was an asshole. I had no idea how to control a horse, but that probably wouldn't have mattered. It completely ignored me, started galloping at random intervals and, about 20 minutes into the trail, stopped altogether and sat down on the ground.
I immediately leapt off the horse. It proceeded to flip over onto its back and roll around in the dirt, kicking its legs in the air while I watched, horrified. One of the counselors ran over and grabbed me, praising me for "knowing" what is, I guess, the correct procedure for not getting crushed to death by a horse.
I still don't know what prompted me to jump off so quickly. It's not like they gave us a class on what to do when your horse decides, "Naw, sick of this walking shit. Imma roll around for awhile." I guess it was instinct; possibly the gut knowledge that this horse was a dick and would totally try to kill me if it got the chance.
I haven't gotten on a horse since.
Sunday, February 26, 2012
I had to make a hardware store run today, so I figured I'd also stop at the Goodwill nearby. Like most thrift stores, this is a pretty hit or miss shop, although this one in particular has been more miss than hit in my experience. This time, though, I found gem after gem. These gorgeous items seemed to jump out at me as soon as I entered the store! Now that I think about it, this may have been my best haul from this particular Goodwill (Clement St.), which up until now could not compete at all with the one on Fillmore.
Strawberry Teapot ~ $3.49
I almost died when I saw this. The only thing I love more than tea is strawberries, and here the two have combined into one gorgeous piece! Also, for $3.49, this might be the most inexpensive piece of teaware I own. It will make a perfect addition to my next lolita tea party.
Teddy Bear Kitchen Canister ~ $5.49
I've said it before, but the easiest way to get me to buy something is to put a teddy bear on it. I love kitchen canisters, too. (I have a Sear's Merry Mushroom canister set holding dry goods in my cupboard.) I buy a lot of bulk dry goods, so it's always nice to have a sturdy container to store them in. PLUS, TEDDY BEARS.
HUGE Pastel Pink & Lavender Unicorn Plush ~ $2.49
Okay, seriously, this thing is huge. I feel like the $2.49 price tag should have been a mistake, especially since Goodwill stores seem to have this odd tendency to price items by size (often to one's advantage; I got a Yixing teapot for 99 cents at the Fillmore Goodwill.) Anyway, who cares, because a giant pink and lavender unicorn now lives on my couch.
Not pictured: 3 denim mini skirts and a tartan mini skirt originally from Torrid, $5.49 each. The Torrid skirt is too big, but that's an easy fix. I didn't feel like photographing them, so just imagine cute denim skirts that make my ass look amazing.